the ultimate strip club list

a guy's guide to strip clubs

July 9, 2008  •  Vol. 15, Issue 190

IMPORTANT NOTE: Mystique has gone to Male Dancers on Friday & Saturdays. The rest of the week is still girls dancing. The club is on it's way down, but still alright for a beer with some scenery away from downtown in your home neighbourhood.

But just as one club is dying another is born - why not check out the new Jay Jays Inn in Etobicoke (2847 Lake Shore Blvd. West). It's the new one that's been in all the papers because the community complained. It's really slow but it has a lot of potential and I hope it takes off.

Had been in TO for a week on business, and needed some entertainment on my last night there. The ratings here made the club sound worth trying.

Coming from south of the 49th and used to lots of restrictive US rules about these places, I was in for a few shocks. First off, (pleasant shock) the club is not hidden in some industrial wasteland or down a deserted downtown alley. Its in the middle of suburbia. As I came down from the subway station (~ 5 mins walk), I passed houses with gardens, office blocks, then a strip of shops, restaurants, and finally the Mystique Lounge.

Another shock (bad) when I walked in. About 11pm on an early weeknight, and I was almost the only customer. Even in Boston, there are more customers at this time! There were a couple of other guys sittings with some dancers, but they left after I'd been there about 10 mins. You walk straight in off the street, no entry fee, everything is on one level with the bar on the right, single stage on the left, and sofas and chairs in between. There's private booths at the front and back of the club.

Beer was about $6.50 for a Heineken - a nice change from the $9-10 in the US. But I was still disturbed by how quiet the club was. There was maybe 5-6 dancers around, most not very attractive. Their clothing wasn't really imaginative either. The dancer who had been on stage, but hadn't stripped down, came down and joined me at the bar almost immediately. It took about 5 mins for another dancer to replace her on the stage. We talked for a few mins - it was all hustle from the opening line - but maybe that made sense given the time and location. She told me the front booths were $20 per song, the back booths were for a half hour at undetermined price. I could have two girls in a booth for twice the price.

Despite the fact I wasn't warming to her personally, she did have a great body, so eventually I let her hustle me into the booth. We had three songs together. She wore a tied tshirt, bra, panties and micro skirt. After the first song, she had the panties off and the skirt rode up her waist. She undid the shirt and unclipped the bra during the second song. The mileage was pretty high, with breasts rubbed in my face, excellent views of the kitty, and great grindage. I got to touch her ass gently a few times. While this was working out great, I hoped that maybe there would be a gem out there amongst the dearth of customers and attractive dancers, so I stopped her at three dances.

I walked out and sat on a sofa watching the stage for a few mins. Another 5 or 6 dancer with her top on. Then along came the gem. Tatiana from Serbia. She was tall, thin, and had spectacular, all genuine DD's. She was in a tight fitting dress and boots. I was done at "hello". We talked for a few mins, and she ushered me into her "office".

If the first dancer gave great mileage, Tatiana was 10 times better. She took the dress off immedaitely, but teased me by keeping her bra and panties on for most of the first song, before finally dropping the panties and then revealing the twins in their glory. She smashed them in my face when she wasn't grinding me like no tomorrow. When she knealt in front of me, she massaged my erection with the top of her head, or tried to suck me through my jeans. After two or three songs, she guided my hands to her perfect ass, and let me massage and squeeze her butt cheeks . She could bend over and get the perfect grinding position that made me feel like I was fucking her right there. She has the motion and pressure points down pat. She straddled me and let me run my hands from her ass all up and down her back as she leant into me. She stood up and stood astride me, and plucked her clit from between her moist lips and began to play with it, inches from my face. After about 5 songs, as she was leaning back against my chest, she took my hands to her breasts, and encouraged me to massage them and squeeze and stroke her erect, hard nipples. We contiuned in this position or the fucking-doggy-style position until we'd been through seven songs, and I told her I needed to stop.

It was truly one of the most amazing lap dance experiences I've ever had - a true GFE as she tried to kiss me and pur in my ear throughout as well. However, then came the problem.

I thought I was out of cash and needed to pay her. I went to the ATM machine on premises. Unlike other ATMs in Canada in the US, it doesn't let you choose the bank account to deduct funds from - a problem for me (joint account). Second, it was going to assess a 15% service charge. Finding this out bought a sudden end to the half hour of fun, but then I found some extra cash. Tatiana was very accomodating, and wanted to ensure I wouldn't end up in any domestic trouble.

She was the pure gem in an otherwise near-deserted, undistinguished neighborhood titty bar. Tatiana alone is responsible for raising my rating to 8, and dancer rating to 7 from a probable 5. From a US point of view, that value rating would have been 10, except for the ATM! Make sure you bring enough cash before you enter!

Drove by on the weekend and saw a new sign in front of the doorway... Male Dancers, Fri. and Sat. nights...... Oops... That would explain the over developed clit I saw on the last dancer I had... lol... Not sure what happened to the girls or how long this has been going on....Girl dancers are every other night of the week.... This will change the girls over I think.... Alot of girls worked only on Fri. and Sat. nights... Since i am not allowed out on school nights...lol... This pretty much excludes me from going here any longer....

Went to this place, looking for something different in TO. It was very quite with a few locals. The girls were few in number, but high in quality. They have a full menu and thay also offer private boths for dances. Got good mileage on my dances from numerous girls. The more dances you get the better the mileage is what I noticed. If you looking for a easy going place to pass sometime, I would suggect it....