the ultimate strip club list

a guy's guide to strip clubs

July 9, 2008  •  Vol. 15, Issue 190

Dropped in on a Friday early afternoon. Friday's are most definitely the busiest of the week during the day. They have a lunch buffet that I have not tried but must be decent as many seem to show up for it. The dancers have a wide range from 4-8 per the babble rating system. I have noticed that YMMV is also pretty wide ranging. Dances are along a couch/bench area maybe 20-30 feet removed from the main seating area. No real privacy. If you want to spend more time and money you can get a private room upstairs. I believe the cost is $100 for 5 songs $200 for 30 minutes and I know there is a 1hour option but I don't want to misquote the price. I highly suggest that you get at least 1 dance downstairs before opting to try out the private area to see if you are in sync with the dancer on what you like. There are a few dancers who will make things very fun and others who I would wonder what the score of the game at the bar is...

Went here on a Tuesday night - sort of stumbled onto it after a work gig. Girls were polished up and performing - very little personal touch. Carmella, who was extremely hot gave me a good 5 songs for $125 show - but it was a show. Not much mileage and while she was good - it seemed like it was just the same exact lapdance she gave the last guy. Beforehand, she was full of good conversation, fun to be with, but in the private area, it was all business and not much more.

Bouncer is this russian named Igor - hilarious accent to match his oversized door man mentality. nice enough guy- but you just have to laugh.

I dropped by the Gold Horse Saloon on a Tuesday evening at about 9 PM. It's close to downtown but has ample free parking. The Russian doorman/bouncer was very friendly, immediately explaining all the options, mainly $30 per private dance, four for $100. Admission was free. There were about six dancers, all in the 3 to 7 range. Immediately, the prettiest girl in the place (a short blonde) approached me and explained that there was no pole in the back room where private dances occurred, so she'd use me as the pole. While this sounded very promising, I explained that I wanted to watch some dances first and get warmed up. Unfortunately, the uninspired dances of her colleagues did little to accomplish this, and later, when she eventually danced, her dance was energetic, but not very erotic. So I decided not to take her up on the admittedly enticing offer (in retrospect, I regret this decision, since $30 now seems a small price to pay to at least find out what she meant!).

Overall, the dance and dancer quality at the Gold Horse was not great; the motivation was low, probably due to the few patrons on a Tuesday evening (at one point, I was the only one there). I decided to leave to see some prettier girls and more erotic dancing, so I headed to Christie's Cabaret and wasn't disappointed. But I think that a visit to the Gold Horse Saloon could be a good idea if you go to Christie's first. That way, Christie's (which offers beautiful, erotic women, but probably the world's worst private dances; see my review) can warm you up with its stage show, and then the blonde at the Gold Horse Saloon can use you like a stripper pole.

This club has become one of the better clubs in the downtown area. It doesn't have the large 'cabaret' feel however the attractiveness of the girls for the most part matches that type of establishment. You walk into the building and the main bar is along the wall to your right. The stage is on the opposite wall facing you with the seating between the two. There is a private dance area on both ends of the building with more privacy (opaque screens) around the couches on the left end facing the stage.

Girls attractiveness as stated before is pretty good for this area with most girls in the 6-8 range with a few higher depending on your visit times. It seems you will get more attention if you sit at or near the end of the bar farthest from the entrance. There is somewhat of a catering towards regulars however that is probably where the bread is buttered for the danceers. Your best bet is to tip a couple bones at the stage and mention where you are sitting.

Private dances I believe are $30 per song or 4 for $100. Kind of pricey and as always YMMV. I can remember 3 dances over the past several months and almost all included varying degrees of mutual contact. The last time in, the door man and dancer both tried to sell me on a 30 minute private room for $250. I did not partake as that is very high IMO. I opted for the 4 for $100 and asked the gal what the difference would be. She stated 'You would get ALOT more from me in the private room'. Well anything substantial more than I got for that dance would have required protection and probably more than 30 minutes.

Drinks are expensive but dont seem watered down. Lunch is advertised but I have not tried. Overall its a good place for downtown if you want to spend a few extra bucks for a little bit better looking gals.