the ultimate strip club list

October 12, 2008  •  Vol. 15, Issue 285

Without a doubt, the worst club I've ever been to.

I was in the club less than 30 seconds, both girls I could see had huge c-section scars, looked like they had track marks on their arms, and were so ugly, it would be an injustice to call them a 1. The only reason the club gets a 2 from me instead of a 1 is that I didn't get shot while inside and from the looks of this place, it's seen that kind of action before.

Maybe my short visit didn't do justice to the place, but even if they had the best dances and the cheapest drinks, I wouldn't be there, I'd be down the street at Mardi Gras.

Went to Teddy B's (Now Club 418) on a Monday afternoon - was pleasantly surprised - the new owners have remodeled - added several new TV's (including a large projection-screen model) and ripped out one of the bars, replacing it with table seating. They still have a good selection of ethnic (A/A & Hispanic) women - mostly on the thick side (much to my liking - now if only they would stop shaving - I miss bush - not the one in the White House.....but I digress...). I got a bar dance from a thick honey who placed the goods about 2 inches from my face - we struck up a convo and I ended up getting 2 dances from her - excellent grindage w/some mutual touching - overall a pleasant experience - will definitely return with more $$ to spend.

I was in Springfield on business last week and stopped in the club. This is a very Ghetto type club but it can be a lot of fun. I got a dance from a blond dancer named Bambi, very good dance, and she was a lot of fun to talk to. There was a lot of contact during the dance which is new or Mass clubs. More girls came in as the night went on and you had a few that were really stunning. Almost all were black or latina. Drinks were $4, and I would recommend the club is you like the grittier side of life. As it got later and later more thug type guys came in and I left. I would go back.

Stopped by on a Sunday afternoon. 4 or 5 girls working, ranged from a 2 to a 6. The 6 was a slender, friendly woman named Monique. Be sure not to pay her up front as she will burn you.

Don't know if it's still called Teddie B's - saw a sign on the door that said "Club 418" (which used to be around the corner - name changed when Mardi Gras bought it...??)) Got a dance from a nice thick black/hispanic lady....get this - she was FRIENDLY..... not used to that these days.... definitely going back when I have some more time and $$$ to spend....
BTW - the bartender got up on the stage and gave a dollar dance to this dude...she was cute & thick - (i'm into the thick thing...) but her post-preggie belly was hanging down - kinda detracted frm the dance....still good to see though - I've been to a lot of clubs where I wish the bartender would dance because they looked better than the dancers....:-)

Let's get right to the point here. Never mind the dangerous neighborhood, the dilapidated building, or any of those other things. There are clubs that appear not to have a retirement plan. There are clubs that appear not to have a gym. Teddy's appears not to have a dental plan. I fled...

Stopped by here the last time I was in Springfield - a shame to see how one of my favorite haunts has gone downhill - place was absolutely DEAD... girls standing around conversing and givng 1/2 hearted dances.... I had my 1 drink and headed out - don't know if I'll head back......

Well... friend from over sea visited me last week, and I thought I take hime around town to experience the culture. Teddyb was the second place that I took him to. He told me that I should had brought him to this place first. It turns out, after visiting this place, any other strip clubs seems much better.

We went in on a Wednesday evening, after visiting mardi gra a few blocks down. This place had 3 girls, 2 of them were out side smoking with their street cloths. Apparently, it wasn't there turn to dance. That and there weren't many, patrons... Us two more than doubled the number of patrons that night.

The girls were friendly, thank goodness, and very chatting. No one really pushed for any dances. Thank goodness again. They ladies were much better than the old kit cat club at Berlin turn pike, in that, at least they weren't pregnant at the time. However, the girls aren't that hot at all.

We managed to finished our beer quickly.

If you have visitors visiting you... this is a great place to start, as once you hit dirt, any other girls you see in other bars seems perfect 10s... (other than fifth alarm, we walked in, and walked out).



I kept my expectations simple and was still disappointed. To call this a dive would be an understatement. The place looked like it was about to fall down. There was one 'dancer' playing video poker and another on the 'stage'. The bartender was actually pretty cute. A nice blonde. Got a cheap bear and sat down at the stage. The 'dancer' on stage was fat, pretty ugly and rather crude. She was with a guy 2 seats down from me having some shots and arranging their 'date' for later. After about 15 minutes of this she moved to another guy who I believe actually worked at the place getting ice and other stuff. After another 10 minutes or so she headed in my direction as I had a pile on ones in front of me. But alas she stopped at the guy she had been sharing shots with. She never looked at me. So I picked up my money looked and left. I wouldn't go near there again even for a date!

High ceilings and cheap beer. The dancers were more than a little tired looking, but even that isn't so bad. After all, if you are going here, you know what you are getting into. What really turned me off was the attidude. Three dancers on stage all sitting talking with the regulars. Usually I find that at a lower quality place the dancers work a bit harder. Not here. I won't return.

Dive club just up the street from the Mardi Gras. The girls are older and not as hot, so they know they should keep you happy. Your dollar at the stage gets you more mileage than a private dance at the Gras. Go on a slow afternoon, treat the girls like people, talk about what turns you both on, pay for a private and the sky's the limit. No taking the monster out, but as close to sex as you can get with your clothes on.