the ultimate strip club list

October 10, 2008  •  Vol. 15, Issue 283

After a disappointing time at Brass Mule (or Ass) I walked down the street to Brass Bull. Immediately upon entering you could see the clubs were related, although this one differed in a couple of ways. First, it was much smaller. Walk in and you can see everything pretty quickly. (Bar and stage were both smaller as well.) As I entered a very overweight blonde, Pat, as I later found out, was dancing. Being the generous guy I am I gave her a buck as I walked in and headed to the bar. (In retrospect that might have made her think to come over to me when all I wanted to do was demonstrate that I had a generous side. (Yes, maybe some would say "PL," but others would recognize that's the way to get their attention on a seemingly slow night). After her show she came up and asked me if I was interested in a dance. In probably her second sentence she said she swallowed and I'd have a good time. Guess it all depends on the messenger, but 5'8" overweight with a masculine body frame is not my time. (Seriously, "tranny" flashed in my mind and I tried desperately to see if an adam's apple existed...) After I sat at the bar for a while and enjoyed my water I was waved to by a dancer named Lindsey (for looking like Lohan she claims). She proceeded to run down the various prices and seating options. I opted for a $55 thinking that I had finally found someone I could work with. Immediately she's like give the bartender $62 for a tip. Okay, maybe she'll leave me alone. Once we get to the booth she asks for an additional side tip to make sure that I had a good experience. Although she wanted more, we agreed on an additional $40. After that I want to give her credit for taking her time playing free willie. No rush and pressure, so that was appreciated. Definitely would go there and look for her again. Can't really comment on any of the other dancers. On average there were 3-4 that bested the talent across the street at Brass Mule. I'd go back here again in a minute. I gave the club a reasonably high rating because it delivered exactly what I was looking for. If you're looking for a fully nude club with hot women, probably not for you. If you're looking to solve your Mick Jagger "can't get no satisfaction," I suspect you would be able to find your cure here.

The more I go to the club the more I really enjoy it... I guess I have become a regular, as the girls have really started to remember me. I have been offered a lot of things in this club, and I'd say I am not comfortable accepting 99% of them... Most of the girls who offer things I am not comfortable with are girls that I am not attracted to, so saying no thank you isnt hard. I find that as long as you are polite, you dont get any rude girls, just dont promise them all you will think about taking them up on their offer because you will never get left alone. This past time I had a lot of fun with Tiger... She is quite a handful literally. Very sexy and loves to play. For a $55 and a small tip I left very happy and I will say she really knows how to use her hands. Totally worth the visit and always a nice release.

Similar to the co-owned Brass Mule across the street - see my review there for overall trend.

The Bull on the night I went had fewer dancers and of a more variable quality. No VIP here, and all of the public seating is more public than across the street. It was a bit more laid-back, though.

I must confess that part of my problem may have been a lack of cash - I bought drinks with a CC (yes, I know better - sometimes, it happens) and found that I could not add an additional tip for the dancers - their share of the 'drink' is fixed. I was honest with both ladies who joined me, though, and we came to a satisfying arrangement if I bit more than I wanted to spend and a higher percent going to the house.

Pretty rough place. They scam you instantly for drinks that start at $55.00. Looks like a lot of mileage if you are a regular. I was affraid to try, all of the decent looking women were taken and the ones that were available were pushy, heavy, and old. I may try again just for the heck of it, there was no cover and beers were about $3.00. The place could use a good cleaning, very heavy smoke odor, I noticed right away and I am a smoker. I was only there about a half hour but when I got home it smelled like I was in a bar for the whole day.

Wednesday evening visit around 10PM: 7 or 8 girls, slightly cuter than across the street (5 to 7's) - an ok mix if you tend towards larger gals but that's not my preference. It's the classic "buy a drink game" with girls being clear that more is available for more expensive drinks. There are some dining room style booths towards the back which you sit with the lady for the more expensive drinks. Quite likely YMMV; I wouldn't know because the only girl half-attractive to me was focused her regulars and unavailable. Fairly depressing place overall; it gets a "2" because I save "1" for clubs who have no dancers.

Visiting friends in Cincinnati, stopped by the old 'strip' in Newport on way from airport. Not as populated w/ clubs of this nature as it used to be, popped in here for a few beers and some scenery. Here's the lowdown- the drinks are overpriced, the girls are bored, some are hideous and some are fairly hot. They will hustle you, try to get you to drop some dollars for a tableside affair. If you're looking for high mileage, you can do very well here... very, very well. If you're looking for a spiffy joint w/ the hottest young thangs and a high-class atmosphere, this is NOT the place for you. So, it all depends on what you want... It's dark, even in the day, and if you find a girl that appeals to you you'll have a good time, even if you just want to enjoy a drink and some conversation. If you're looking to kill an hour or two, not a bad option...

Well, I thought that LeFoxx was the worst club I've ever been to, but the bull was even worse. No cover, but ALL of the dancers, and I mean all of the dancers, were old and out of shape. Depressing! The club is old, smoke filled and the other guys in the place looked like total losers. This is not a place for the professional crowd. The neighborhood is rough and I was worried the entire time about my car.

Even though Concepts is a much longer drive (near Argosy in Indiana off I-275), it is well worth the time to get a decent dance there - just look at porn on the internet over this place!!

After leaving The Brass Mule, I walked across the street to this club arriaving at 10:20PM, Saturday, August 19, 2006. No cover was assessed as I entered.

I purchased my $2.50 coke at the bar and soon took a seat at the one and only, very small stage to the right of the club. I noticed about 8 customers and 6 dancers, ranging in appearance from (6-8) I tipped the onstage dancer (8), as dancers were flashing the "gash" to get tips. The onstage dancer joined me at the stage after her dance. She gave me her name, but I had forgotten it. She talked me into buying her a $110 drink so that "WE" could go back to one of the 'dining' type booth and play around, as she was stroking me outside my trousers. Sounded enticing, and seeing that I hadn't gotten any action at the previous visited clubs, I was getting kind of horny anyway.

Arriving at one of the booths, she instructed me to scoot in first and prop my right leg up on the seat. She scooted in next to me, with her drink and the fun began! She pulled my shirttail out, unsnapped my trousers, pulled the zipper down, (good thing I usually go COMMANDO) and 'FREED WILLY! Readily applying lotion to him she began stroking and talking. Surprisingly, a second dancer (7.5) came over to our booth, reached her hand over and helped Mr Happy along herself. I found out that the dancer drink prices were also timed by the bartender, based on size/cost of drink. I opted to purchase my first dancer another drink, but at $58 this time. She allowed me to play and suck on top, and even pet the kitty and play with her clit. The second dancer, of course a good friend of the first dancer, came back later, and I opted to purchase her a $110 drink (via credit card-first time I've ever done that). I had more cash in the car, but didn't want to get dressed to go get it! Second dancer continued taking care of Mr Happy along with the first dancer. My first dancer had to go on stage, leaving me alone with the second dancer, who eventually leaned back on me and fell asleep!!! Upon return of the first dancer & finding out what had transpired while she was dancing, got pissed off! She went and told the Bird Dog/Security about her friend falling asleep while being with me and not entertaining me. That "sleepy" dancer really got berated by him and he also apologized to me. The first dancer tried to get my $110 back from her friends drink cost, but the bartender said she had already ran my credit card purchase through and couldn't give me a refund. (We all know that credit card credits can be added, don't we??) I didn't argue, as my attire was still somewhat disheaveled!! I started 'getting dressed' kind of, while the first dancer was still trying to get me off. I had an enjoyable time with her, as we spent a lot of time together talking and playing in the booth.

I departed the club at 11:35PM, spending around $300, which was too much for what I received, but made up for the money I refused to spend in Covington, KY.

Both Newport clubs are bikini bars, but gash flashing is permitted by the owners. YMMV can be had, with most dancers in this club, and probably as a regular, can get even more action. However, dancer and customer has to stay alert for other customers, as all other club employees knows what goes on inside, as long as 'playing' stays 'below the sheet' and not displayed openly.

I rate this club at 5, basically because it is somewhat of a 'dive' inside, but again YMMV can be had, but at an inflated price of dancers drinks. I would probably return to this club if ever in the area, but here again, will probably never be in the area again. :-)



This was one nasty club. Small, and very dark. The women are not attractive, though I stayed long enough to see everyone working. Perhaps it was a bad night? This place makes the Brass Ass look pretty fantastic in comparison. I was approached at one point by a woman who, no joke, looked and sounded like an uncle of mine. I fled for the hills.

Stopped on a weekday afternoon. Girls are friendly and ask for tips for juke box. No lap dancing, but you buy the dancer a drink at the bar for $18 or a drink at the coffee table for $35 or a in a sofa for $55. Apparently the amount of time the drink lasts depends upon the price paid. Bought an $18 drink at the bar for a good looking dancer. Was asked to go to the sofa area, but declined due to high price. Good conversation.

Actually had a half-way decent time here one afternoon recently. 2 or 3 fairly attractive young dancers were working that day. Unfortunately they were too busy talking with each other to make some $$$, but one of the older gals who I remember from a few years back took me to a corner booth and we had a nice little time. Very friendly and we spent an enjoyable time together. I'll stop back, hopefully the younger ones will have rent due so they get up off their ass, but if not it's nice to know some of the old standbys are willing to please.

As others have stated, no laps in this godforsaken city, just drinks with occasional extras and girls coming around every couple of minutes asking for a $1 for the jukebox.

Did not see the younger ones this time. More of the older types. Lot of hustle "how about $1 for juke box". The one or two girls that I wanted to have a conversation with were busy either talking with each other or with other customers.

Stopped here after a long absence. Place is remodeled, and looks brighter. Amazingly the quality of the girls has significantly improved. Most of the 'mature' dancers seem to be gone. Saw lots of younger, good looking one's in the 6-8 range. Drinks at the bar are $18 for a conversation and are $55 plus tip in a booth.

Dancers are generally in the range of 4 to 5. Once in a while you will run into a 7. Place is friendly. Bar tenders are friendly. Girls ask you for $1 for the juke box before going on stage. You can get a slight feel while you tip them. This can indicate whether you want private time with her after the dance. Private booths are not that private, but time with the dancers could be expensive. Dancers drink are $18 at the bar, $38 at the booth and $100+ for chamapign etc. Some xtras are possible depending on the dancer. This place could attract more clients if they start offering LDs for a reasonable price.

If you want a good lap dance in Cincinnati area, try Concepts in Lawrenceburg or Cheeks in Centerville.

I visit this club every few months. This is a small club in a town with very few options. However it has been recently remodeled and had plenty of entertainers on hand. The bar is directly in front of the stage so you can drink and watch without hurting your neck. The tables are in the back dimly lit area. There are two side stages that get used when the place is crowded. The ladies that dance are very entertaining, the music is at a good volume that you can chat if you want to. You wont go mute the next day trying to talk over the music. The ladies are pretty and most are in good shape. There are no couch dances, but you can buy drinks for time at the bar, or a table. The drinks are reasonably priced and the entertainment value is worth the money. This is a bikini bar, no nudity.

Cincinnati (and the surrounding area) could REALLY use a great strip club. Pickings are very slim 'round here, as most locals know. This club, in Newport (just across the river) is, unfortunately, not the answer.

I visited last Thursday evening. I'm guessing this club is associated with the Brass Mule (or whatever) just across the road. Strange arrangement. But I stopped there, too, and neither club is very impressive.

The bottom line is this: you can spend $110 to take a not-very-attractive girl to a (cough) "private" booth --- which is naturally not very private with a waitress hounding you every 5 minutes to buy more drinks. The hustle factor is very high --- higher probably than anywhere else I've been. I'm thinking that "extras" are available --- I mean, for that price there must be *something* going on, right? But I don't know first-hand. If extras were not available the place could not possibly survive. The dancers are just unattractive. Period. Not a one of them was attractive.

The only favorable comments I can make are that the bartender was very friendly and the drinks were reasonably priced. But if that's what you're after, why go here?

My advice: stay away. If you're near Cincinnati and you're looking for action, drive 45 minutes north to Dayton. The clubs there are much better.