the ultimate strip club list

September 7, 2008  •  Vol. 15, Issue 250

Went to Woody's because I was staying nearby and had nothing to do. First off, the cover was a bit steep IMO for a Tuesday night - $10, and private dances were $25. Not great prices, but the drinks are reasonable - around $5-$6 for a beer. When I got there, it was around 9pm, and granted it was a Tuesday night, so it was slow. It's a bit of a dingy place, with pine paneling and a large bar that takes up about half the space. The pole area is surrounded by a waist-high wall which boxes in the dancer, but allows for chairs to be placed all around the area for tipping. The bar also has a stage where a live band (Big Dick and the Extenders, I think) plays on weekends. Dancers ranged from 2-3 to about 6 or so. There were a couple of 7's, but for the most part, it averaged around a 5 (caveat being a Tuesday night). Dancers were relatively friendly, and each did 2 pole dances. Private dances are done in a corner, no booths, just couches, and everything's pretty much in plain view. I was able to negotiate a 3 song set for $50, which was a decent deal. Contact was ok, no real touching on my part, although there was a decent amount of contact on her part.

All in all I'm giving it a 5 as there's nothing else around in the area so you have to take that into context.

I seem to be the only one that can grasp the concept of Woody's. Is it a typical SC, yes, up till the live music. I've been about 6 times in the last couple of years. Yes, it is the only game in town on the Keys outside Key West. Yes, a few dancers can be on the 3-4 side, and most in the middle, but I have always seen a couple far up the food chain. Hard to find??? It is on US1, the ONLY way to go on the Keys between the mainland and Key West. If you can't find it, you must be blind, very drunk, or perhaps dead. The cover is $8, but I've only had to pay once. A bit high, but when you are the only game in town, well! The place is nice, with a large bar and two LD areas. They are not private, rather just a bit out of the main club. One in the front, the other in back. Most all contact is one way. I have seen LE come in a few times, but they leave everyone alone. They seem to have a pretty good relationship with the club management. Leaving the club, well there is only one way, US1 and they do watch it at later hours. Just a typical club, but nothing exceptional.

Now, on to the live show. Big Dick And The Extenders play Thursday, Friday, and Saturday evenings starting at 11 PM. The show starts with a few insults and if you happen to make yourself a target, YOU will be the main target. Rude and crude, but this IS a SC. He makes it very well know it is a SHOW, nothing more. If someone takes what he says seriously, then they have a problem. He then introduces the dancer, and sometimes tells a little about them. From that point on it is back to a regular SC, except with some good live music, sometimes broken up by a few comments and banter.

For us old guys, brings back the old burlesque show memories of years past. Is it the best club in South Florida, no. The best in the Keys, no. Is it a 1-2 club, no. I've been to many clubs in many states, and there are plenty that are worse, well MUCH worse. So, it ends up being an average club with a twist that revives some burlesque of old.

My home area is Chicago...this club would pretty much suck there...in Florida its truly pathetic. I was down vacationing and riding around on the scooter...stopped in when I noticed the sign, place was a bit of a bitch to find. Wasn't worth it. The women were good looking, but shows not too good. Couldn't get the vibe for the life of me, turned out that there were no real lap dances, the private were in a common area on chairs and very little contact, was almost impossible to get dancers attention, even when tipping the typical bills at the rail.
All in all a real disappointment. Very lame atmosphere.

Worst strip club i have ever been to. And I have been to MANY. Too steep of a cover charge, and as some one said only charged to strangers. Below average girls who give sub par lap dances from what I saw. And a live band that is so rude you have to be a self hating person to put up with it. Big Dick is no Don Rickles so he should give up the comedy, and maybe the guitar also. Drive up to Miami or down to KW if you want to be entertained.

was there in 2003, women there had no personality and seemed desperate. they would ask you if you wanted a lap dance and not give you time to answer before walking off to the next person. worst one there looked like darlene from the roseanne show.

Got there about 9:45 on a Thurs (1/5/06). Paid the cover of $8 got some beers and found a table. There was on ok blond nude finishing up on the pole and a few below average girls working guys over on the couches in back. After the blond finished the dancers stopped for the "big dick" show - and he was. Full of personal insults and racist jokes. We left after he insulted everyone at our table twice. It is the only place around there but not worth a vist.